Series One/ post 4
I’ve spent extended time sharing about passion and desire over the past two weeks because they are essential for the true health of our heart and soul. (I encourage you to go back and read them if you haven’t already.) This week I would like to turn my attention to the second lesson we learned from our gardening adventure. There are both practical and spiritual applications to share from our experience.
In our plans to begin a garden, we neglected to “Ask the Experts.” The little research I did before we began could not compare to the amount of knowledge I could have received had I asked a master gardener for all the tips and tricks based on their experience. Because we did very little research, we were not able to fully count the cost (expense, time, commitment, etc.) before we began. I think in all the excitement to get started quickly, we kind of rushed past the research part and just jumped in. Have you found yourself in the same situation? Excitement takes over, so you leap ahead without much consideration instead of weighing the costs rationally.
We often rely on the feelings of excitement as the only motivation for completing a project. When the excitement wears off and things get difficult, it’s hard to maintain momentum to complete the task. Instead, we lose steam and give up easily. It reminds me of whenever I open a new puzzle. I’m initially all excited to get started. First, I assemble the edge pieces and then move to some of the bigger sections of color. About that time, I usually hit a “roadblock” (check out last week’s post) because the pieces start to look alike or are oddly shaped. Things start to get frustrating, my excitement wears off, and it’s simply not enough to keep me going. The puzzle usually ends up neglected once I reach that point or it doesn’t get finished. As you can see, feelings and emotions alone aren’t enough to base decisions on or keep us motivated (check out post two).
The best thing to do when you don’t understand something is to ask for help! I am constantly reminding Naomi (my oldest) to ask questions when there is something she doesn’t understand. Math is the subject she struggles with the most, and it can easily overwhelm her. I’ve told her many times she doesn’t need to be afraid to ask because the questions help others know what she doesn’t understand, so they can help her more effectively break down the problem. She can ask for clarification (for it to be reworded), for a sentence to be repeated (to confirm she heard correctly), or ask for a visual interpretation (because she understands things better visually). In this way, understanding comes easier and the task can be completed.
Consulting an expert has a lot of benefits. With their specialized knowledge and experience they can provide advice, insight, and solutions. The expertise they offer can provide different perspectives, a way of breaking down complex issues into manageable steps or even improve peace of mind knowing we made informed decisions. For these reasons and more, asking the experts helps guarantee our success as we continue to learn and grow. If we remain humble enough to ask for help, we can also reap the benefits of saving money, resources, time, and frustrations.
Asking the experts for help is the key to ANY success, not just in gardening. I believe it’s especially true in our spiritual journey. There is a LOT to understand, and it’s easy to get overwhelmed. Taking my questions to the Source has become the best way for me to “ask the expert.” I’m often tempted to run to other sources first, as I have in the past. I’ve asked my parents, friends, and mentors. Even though those sources all seem reliable, they still don’t know me as well or as thoroughly as my Father. I’ve since learned the Father KNOWS me best (and just plain knows best) because of three important facts:
#1 He created me
#2 He loves me
#3 He wants the BEST for me even MORE than I want it for myself.
He created me.
Psalms 139:13 reassures me, “For you created my inmost being; you knit me together in my mother’s womb.” Verses 15 and 16 continue: “My frame was not hidden from you when I was made in the secret place, when I was woven together in the depths of the earth. Your eyes saw my unformed body; all the days ordained for me were written in your book before one of them came to be.” I gain a strong sense of identity and purpose knowing that I am not merely an accident or that I appeared by chance. I was created on purpose, with a purpose, and the Father knows the full extent of my days. Resting in this truth helps me deny the lies of the enemy because it reminds me, I am known intimately.
He loves me.
One of my favorite verses that reminds me of the Father’s love for me is Jeremiah 31:3. It says, “I have loved you with an everlasting love; I have drawn you with loving-kindness.” His love for me is not temporary. It’s a forever kind of love–a love that is all encompassing. The way He shows me He loves me is by wooing my heart. He orchestrates things in such a way that He knows will make me feel special, appreciated, and loved.
A simple, but good, example of this happened on a Valentine’s date night with my husband. Mind you, my husband is like most men and is budget conscious while dining out. He doesn’t usually go for the “extra.” We typically order water with our meal and stick to whatever comes with the meal–no appetizers, no extra sides, no dessert. This particular night, our steaks were not cooked according to our specifications, and we had to send them back. The manager came by our table to apologize and offered a free dessert that was on special that evening because of Valentine’s. We thanked her and waited for our promised dessert. I was so surprised to see a huge piece of cheesecake all decked out with strawberries and cream, just the way I love it! Right then, I knew the Father had made a way to give me a special dessert on a special night. He reminded me I was worth the “extra.”
“The best kind of love is the kind that awakens the soul; that makes us reach for more, that plants the fire in our hearts and brings peace.” ~Paulo Coelho
The Father spends time awakening my soul in a variety of ways. I have had to sharpen my senses the past couple of years, but He often uses song lyrics, passages of scripture, kind words from a friend, hugs, or similar significant gestures like the cheesecake as a way of speaking and showing me His love. He IS speaking, but His words often fall on deaf ears. Sometimes, I get too busy or become too distracted to notice ALL the ways He is showing me His love. In 1 Kings chapter nineteen, the Lord did not come to Elijah in a powerful wind, a mighty earthquake, or a blazing fire. Instead, He came to Elijah in the sound of a gentle blowing (1 Kings 19:11-13). I need a constant reminder to turn off distractions and turn down the noise of my day—voices, cell phones, social media, television—you get the idea. We need to purposefully s-l-o-w down, unplug, and pay attention to His still, small voice—that “whisper.” His love assures me I am valuable, worthy, chosen, and loveable. It’s much too vital to miss!
I know it can be easy to doubt the Father’s heart, especially when the lies are much easier to believe and we feel like our doubts and questions are too big for Him to handle. But rest assured, He is much bigger than any lie, situation, issue, doubt, or question we could bring to Him. He loves the opportunity to reveal His love, His goodness, and His faithfulness to us because He wants the best for us even more than we want it for ourselves. I hope you seriously consider taking your questions and doubts to Him, and ask Him to show you His heart about them.
He wants the BEST for me, even MORE than I want it for myself.
I remember when I was in my twenties and all my friends were getting married. It was so hard to keep believing the Father wanted my best. I couldn’t understand why He was delaying in giving me my own husband. As I tried to understand, I prayed He would show me the answer. He reminded me that He DOES want what’s best for me by reminding me of Jeremiah 29:11. “For I know the plans and thoughts that I have for you,’ says the Lord, ‘plans for peace and well-being and not for disaster, to give you a future and a hope.”
Sometimes receiving the BEST means I need to wait. I don’t always FEEL like waiting, especially in this “I must have everything NOW” culture I’ve been immersed in. I’ve learned that waiting on the Father to reveal His best for my life is well worth the wait!! I could have allowed my feelings to take over instead of allowing Truth to guide me, but relying on feelings to make decisions is like standing on sinking sand. It can lead to all kinds of disasters–regret, shame, guilt, and even a broken heart. However, by allowing truth to guide my decisions I set myself on a firm foundation. This verse from Jeremiah reminds me that the Father’s plan for me is peace, well-being, and a reason for hope.
I hope and pray you adopt this kind of mindset, one that seeks the Father’s heart first. I know sometimes it can feel intimidating seeking the Father’s heart, especially if you feel disconnected right now. Perhaps there is someone in your life that you respect or admire. They possess strong faith because they’re assured of the Father’s love, and their life is marked by peace and joy. Even when times are tough, they persevere because their hope is secure. This could be a pastor, friend, mentor, or life coach. Hopefully, with their guidance, you can reconnect with the Father once again. Ultimately, we should seek Him first (Mathew 6:33). Remember, He is the one who made you, He loves you, and He wants what’s best for you even more than you want it for yourself!
I look forward to sharing next week as these lessons continue to unfold. Revisiting them has reminded me of their importance and is helping me stay accountable. I plan to share from the first part of our third lesson: “needing the right tools.” Join me as I explore how a plan and a good location are both essential tools. Sure, you can start without the right tools, but it’s not really a good idea as it can create a bit of a mess. We would have had a much easier start if we had known the value of a plan and a good location.
Much love and Blessings,
Tami
Songs that inspired me while I wrote this post:
-Bodie “Whisper and the Wind”
https://youtu.be/ho6Zvc81jWE?si=49oG3PqXBK_URj6y
-Lauren Daigle “You Say”
https://youtu.be/N8WK9HmF53w?si=ab7DdebGOoJ1oV76
-Big Daddy Weave “I Know”
https://youtu.be/ULFlMgxiyto?si=ULDmJ33-s3Jtd2gf
-TobyMac “Made to Love”
https://youtu.be/cFJ5qCmvPkY?si=_7IPqxAYIMMNXQxm
Special note: Each song has spoken to my heart in a special way throughout my journey. Music has become a way in which the Father speaks life into my heart and soul, like a soothing balm (Zephaniah 3:17). I believe music is one of those “universal” languages. Sometimes you simply can’t put things into words, but music helps express your heart in a way your head can wrap itself around.